Thursday, October 11, 2012

Hard times


There are people in my life who keep me sane. They are not the people you'd expect: the tiny Peruvian woman in her dark skirt and bowler hat, who appears briskly on recycling days and skims the trash for bottles; the ancient lady with her sheitel askew, who shuffles to the grocery store so bent over her walker that she can see only the sidewalk; the weary mom patiently taking her physically and mentally disabled adult son out for a walk.

I've never spoken to any of these people. I smile at them when our paths pass, nodding my appreciation of their existence, being neighborly without being intrusive.

Life is richer when you acknowledge that the world consists of more than your own difficulties. For me it's not a "there but for the grace of God go I" kind of thing. It's more like, "Here by the grace of God go I, and there by the grace of God go you, and yes -- there are hard things in life."

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Recently PBS ran a show based on the book Half the Sky. I didn't watch the show, because I don't have a television that gets reception, and because I'm not sure I really want to see the stories in the book. It's the kind of stuff that sticks with you viscerally: stories of women whose faces were burned with acid, of girls sold into prostitution by their families, of married women shunned and abandoned because they had fistulas.

It's terribly grim stuff, and yet it's a surprisingly heartening book. It's heartening because these women didn't give up -- they survived. And you've kinda gotta think Well if she could get through that, what am I complaining about!

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Someone wrote to me recently and said, "It seems like something is going on in your life right now that you aren't writing about."

Well yes, there is. There is a big thing, a heavy burden which I've been carrying for a very long time that has never made it into these pages. I do not write about it because I wish to respect another person's privacy. I have a handful of friends who check in on me regularly to offer support. But I have been really struggling in recent months. I am worn out and tired and... it's hard.

For those of you who are praying people, I could use your prayers.





18 comments:

  1. I hear you on the 'not talking about it to protect someone else's privacy' that happens on my blog too. So I prattle about creations, and journal pages and not about deep pains. I hope you have someone to talk to about your heavy things in real life. Holding you all in the light.

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  2. Your blog is an inspiration to me. Thank you for sharing, and I will keep you and yours in my prayers.

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  3. Praying for you as you struggle with this hard thing.

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  4. I am one of those praying people . . . I really enjoy reading your thoughts, and I am blessed to have the chance to give something back to you. Fondly,
    Nancy

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  5. Sending prayers for you. Peace be with you.

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  6. Sending Prayers Julia--Remember be not dismayed God is with you

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  7. Dear Julia, you are in my regular prayers!

    This post reminds me of some conversations that I've had with my mother-in-law. When I ask her how things are going and she answers that she's been reading WWII biographies, I know things are hard! But it's true that these stories really are good for perspective and gratitude.

    And also, I think I've seen that Peruvian woman, too, or another one!

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  8. I will be keeping you in my daily prayers, Julia! It would be an honor to do this for you, as your blog has been such an inspiration to me. God gives you only what you can handle, and you are an incredibly strong woman. Hang in there! May God bless you and give you the strength you need right now.
    Christine

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  9. I wish I were a better praying person... but you've got some coming from me anyway! Reading YOU gives me perspective on how easy my life is... Thank you for that!

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  10. Julia, your thoughts are so inspiring to me. Thank you for everything you share. It is an honor to pray for you.

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  11. Julia, I have been reading your blog since you mentioned it in Daily Guideposts. It resonates with me because I, too, have been struggling through some very difficult things for the last few years that I have been unable to reveal to anyone except a few close friends and family. Thank you for sharing with us your strategies for coping; they have helped me immensely. I will pray for you and your family.

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  12. Julie, just as "Florida" has a been reading your blog since she discovered it in a Guidepost essay, so have I. I've read Guidepost for many years and am anxious every morning to read what my "friends" have to share. I am praying for you and for your family. I pray that God grants you and your husband the strength you need to see this period through.
    God bless!

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  13. I am one of your Guidepost readers who came to your blog some time ago. Your gift with words is such an encouragement to me, and I am happy to bring your name before our Lord and ask Him to minister to you.

    Blessings,
    Dar

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  14. Julia, I am sorry you are carrying this burden. You are in my prayers. I hope that in some way, it lightens for you.

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  15. Julia, I,too, get so much from your writings. Please know that you and your family are in my prayers. God cares.

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  16. You are in my heart and prayers.

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